I Regularly Misspell My Own Name... Regularly

We've gotten a lot of complaints here at Yahoodwinked (now a top ten most visited site as ranked by google patrons searching for the phrase "yahoodwinked"), visitors come to our blog and "don't understand what it is." Well, we have only one stance on this issue. "We can't tell you anything without your name, address and mother's maiden name sent to us in email." Seriously though, go to answers.yahoo.com... do it, now! See all the silly questions? Well we write fitting responses and think it is funny. You should too.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

How do write this in algebra???

there are 8 more 5 dollar bills than 1 dollar blls...... thnx:D

Okay, before I start you'll need to install your algebra font. I'm assuming you're using Pythagorean OS with a Euclidian output drive. Just open your five key and add your eight key to your USB port. Put your mouth riiiight next to the cd drive and whisper the secrets of the universe into that blinking red light. As it continues to blink, pour some orange juice onto your keyboard. Allow a few minutes for your computer to completely soak in this freshly squeezed knowledge and you'll soon see the font appear in a series of odd numbers (it'll make sense once you finish reading this, if they are even numbers or top heavy fractions... stand back) and beeps.

Bam, font installed. I make it a point to install this font on everyone's computer. Kinda like a calling card I leave at dinner parties, baby showers and whatever else. Next thing you know, Jaime's wife is on the horn to thank you "so "x=-y+7" much for doing this to our only computer". it's the gift that keeps on dividing itself by zero.

Now to get some dollar bills. Plant a penny in your lawn and sprinkle some dimes, green dye, freshly picked cotton, laminate finishing dyes, a few pairs of seven for all mankind jeans, as many neiman marcus catalogs as your poor arms can afford, a sports car and the broken dreams of capitalism on top. Nothing can grow without fertilizer.

As your dollar tree begins to grow, weep beneath it every day and allow your tears of agony soak into it's strong root system. nothing is better for money growth and potential earnings than patheticism.

You'll soon need to pollinate your tree's buds by chewing each one individually, swallowing and regurgitating them as liquid funds.

Sometimes you'll find a bird has landed in your tree and started a nest and within that conglomeration of hair, twigs and your shammy cloth is an egg. Shoot the bird and smash the eggs. No one wants that in their portfolio. Seems like a giant waste of time and my money tree.

Anyhow, if you've been regurgitating the buds correctly, you should end up with mainly five dollar bills. to see this algebraically, spill another glass of orange juice onto your keyboard. you may want to open up the back of your cpu and drop a knowledge bomb of A1 steak sauce in there as well. just something to get the juices flowing more juicily in your computer's membrane.

Source(s):
Mono(-o+ey)tony is just a long way of saying "I'm rich".

Call me old-fashioned, but gold teeth don't depreciate.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

The placement of the parenthetical interjection is freaking perfect in the passage below.

it made me LOLZ IRL.

Allow a few minutes for your computer to completely soak in this freshly squeezed knowledge and you'll soon see the font appear in a series of odd numbers (it'll make sense once you finish reading this, if they are even numbers or top heavy fractions... stand back) and beeps.