I Regularly Misspell My Own Name... Regularly

We've gotten a lot of complaints here at Yahoodwinked (now a top ten most visited site as ranked by google patrons searching for the phrase "yahoodwinked"), visitors come to our blog and "don't understand what it is." Well, we have only one stance on this issue. "We can't tell you anything without your name, address and mother's maiden name sent to us in email." Seriously though, go to answers.yahoo.com... do it, now! See all the silly questions? Well we write fitting responses and think it is funny. You should too.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Im looking for the name of the song they play at disneyland while they didnt the castle lighting?

before the snow start falling they do the castle lighting show and i realy wanna know the name of th song they played

you came to the right place. while a number of songs are played during castle lightings, only one song is not played when castles are not lighting before snow falling.

during the late middle ages, the appearance of a unicorn drawn carriage in a donkey village at christmas meant no one would be getting electricity that night except in the castle. many mules would take exception to such a rule and not play their favorite song when the castle didn't light. a mule rule for yule, if you wule.

attending to this philosophy was the venerable Merv Griffin who would later found the US government. The US government would eventually become the Walter (Heavypants) Disney Corp, LLC. A little background before we go into this ear-say political ramblings, that is, the corn fed democracy which is to say, "I believe your presence at the Magical Castle BEFORE the snow start falling may be guilt by association".

Now you want to know a song that was played when something didn't happen. Easy enough.

Take a large radish and hide it in your neighbor's woodpile. After six weeks, dig it up and introduce yourself to the magical beanstalk which has grown inside of the radish. If you see an elf instead of a beanstalk, immediately smash the radish with one of the many logs surrounding you. As the beanstalk clears its throat and begins to speak, you will notice that you are outside. Go inside.

Place four cotton balls into each of your ears, and toss a few into your mouth for good measure. Paint a fire hydrant on a second story window using mustard and string cheese. Place your cheek firmly against the window in the middle of the fire hydrant hearing device. Listen to what it is you are not hearing, write it down without moving or hearing anything.

Look up the words you didn't write down in a dictionary, then use the dictionary to open the fire hydrant listening device. It may take three or four throws depending on the strength of your wrists, but eventually the glass will give way.

Yell down to the radish and woodpile, exactly what it is that you haven't heard and what was not in the dictionary. they will not reply, this is customary as they are laughing at you behind that menacing birch and swamp oak frown.

Find another window on the second floor. With your ears still filled with cotton balls, begin heaving books at the window until it gives way. you may need to use magazines and postcards to weigh down the lighter books.

once that window has been opened, you'll need to act fast. build a castle out of legos. construct it at 1:8 scale to replicate the disneyland/government built original. you have 17 minutes and six lego pieces to work with. be creative.

once the castle is complete, irrigate the surrounding fields (carpet) with a garden hose. soak them thoroughly as the farmers will need help, it's rice season and someone's been poisoning their crop with Febreeze DDT all afternoon. also, provide nourishment for both dragons (spot and fido, respectively) and extend the faux topiary branch of peace (should be in the corner somewhere but the queen may have had it moved into her bedroom) to them. bones (of the milkith variety) also help.

allow room for a moat to keep out peasants. i would allow for 6-7 inches of depth (we don't want to get silly here) as that should get through the deepest of floorboards in any house. fill the moat with melted chocolate and... you guessed it! A woodpile with a radish buried in it. This time, the radish will need to sit for 8 weeks and when the elf comes out, you'll need to start castle lighting show. using matches or a spare propane torch from your father's toolbox, ignite some of the dryer pieces of wood. the elf will see the castle, see the approaching blizzard and immediately run back into his radish home, to find his favorite records to not play before the snow start falling.

Source(s):
"Excused" from Disneyland 75+ times.

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