Who is Britannia and why does she rule England ?

Are English royals related to her blood line ?

I'm not totally sure if... answer this for me to confirm your identity... "Does the China-man have a shiny car?"

Okay, good. Donkey mittens and I are moving the rendevous point and the plan is still in action. Our resistance movement is in full effect.

The encyclopedias (no use in making up a code name for a book as domesticated and dare I say taciturn, as the britannia's are) have infiltrated our deepest political offices and have occasionally been opened and flipped through for photo-ops in front of their mahogany shelves.

We need to act soon, or England will be in a perilous situation. Grab these supplies and check back with me or donkey mittens for further instructions.

1 kitchen mop
stuffed moose head
organic carrots
the trunk of a 97 buick regal
one tree
two trees
three threes

Lure the moose to your lap with the carrots. Eat the peels so it doesn't smell the whiskey blood line on your breath.

Once it relaxes and begins to purr, GRAB the moose head and wrap the threes around it's neck in a headcuff. Run into the Buick Regal trunk and close it on your fingers twice to assure us you're a true secret agent.

Now secure yourself in the trunk and get the trees out. After a year or two, the trees will grow and push the trunk open (you'll survive on their oxygen and fruits).

VIVA LA ENCARTA

And who the hell is this Tommy Atkins, anyhow?